Lately I have been caught up in audition for things on voices.com. I have auditioned for 9 jobs and so far have gotten only 1 like. This definitely makes me want to get better. I have always loved acting before I even knew that that is what it was. Even to this day I make up scenarios in my head and start acting out the different parts to it. Though, embarrassing when caught, it is still something I do, and is either connected to acting or is just the fact that I might be mentally unstable. Either way it doesn't change the fact that I want to get better at everything I love to do. When acting I am a different person and all of my problems disappear. If I could make a life based off of this I would be the luckiest person on earth. That is why I try not to just rely on that. I also have art, and I am still not that great at that either. I have so much further to go, and sometimes it gets really stressful just thinking about it. I have lists of lists of things to do, and yes I mean lists of lists.
I have my life long lists
2. becoming a voice actress
and/or
3. becoming an advertisement artist
then there is my list of thing I must do in a year or 2
1.Go to college
2.Get a better job
and then there are my day to day lists
1. Try to do something productive in a day *if fail try tomorrow*
*Productive lists*
A. Try out for more auditions
B. Draw something. If sketched draw a lot of them
2. Try to stay happy by any means *indulging in chocolate, enjoying music, or playing the sims/minecraft/familyguyonline
Sometimes even my simple day to day lists seem so far away, and I just feel like flopping over and just sleeping all day or something. I dont know if it's just me, but I see my goals, and they mean the world to me. I want to make people smile and make them see or hear beautiful and awesome things. I want to touch people even if it's only for a second through a beautiful scene or a moment in a character I play where you as the audience can connect with me.
lol Yeah, super girly dream, but that is what I want and that is what I aim for. I guess now to stop ranting and get back to working, or relaxing, or whatever I decide to do next.
Thanks for reading and sorry about the length >.<